Monday, March 26, 2012
Good Touch/Bad Touch
My name is Mr. Finley, and I will be your guest blogger for the evening. I want to deal with a topic that is near and dear to the heart of every civic-minded pooch.
Good Touch/Bad Touch.
It hardly seems possible in this enlightened age, but there are still humans out there that don't understand how to tell the difference between good touches and bad touches. It is important to educate those who are ignorant and it is with this goal in mind that I approach the topic tonight.
Hands scratching my belly: Good Touch
Hands holding me back from tearing that pesky neighbor dog to pieces: Bad Touch
Hands petting my head: Good Touch
Hands holding Q-tips and cleaning my ears. Very Bad Touch
Hands getting out treats and feeding them to me: Good Touch
Hands turning on the faucet to give me a bath: Bad Touch
Hands holding my tug-of-war rope: Good Touch
Vets' hands: Bad Touch. Period.
Hands making Jackie stay home while I get to go for a ride: Good Touch
Hands pulling ticks out of me: Bad Touch
Hands patting the bed in invitation: Good Touch
These are just a few examples, but I trust they will be sufficient to illustrate the important differences between Good Touch and Bad Touch. In fact, it is so plain I don't see how any human could possibly be confused on the matter. Let us have no more of this uncivilized behav........What is that?
Why do you have the comb and scissors?
Leave my ears alone! I like my burrs. I've been collecting them for weeks! Weeks, do you hear me! Whatever happened to "No one has the right to touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable?" Does having your hair pulled out by the roots look comfortable to YOU!?
NO! BAD TOUCH! BAD TOUCH!
My mom is a hypocrite.